Friday, 23 May 2008

23May08 - Why & How

Why does this not get any easier? There are so many unanswered questions! I have been reluctant to write down my thoughts recently because I have felt that I would just be covering old ground but if that is the case then why is it in the forefront of my mind? I have just had the most unpleasant experience. For those that have been following the blog you will remember a post where I wrote about an incident in my local pub where the word "Spaca" had been used. Tonight the same individual approached me with what he thought was an apology. He maintains that he was unaware of my "situation" and did not "mean anything" by it. Well that's great but what exactly did he mean? I said that I was not offended by what he said because I know that it was not personal but asked him if he thought that using the word was acceptable. Unfortunately I heard what I expected. "its just a normal term"..."no offense but its just a general term". I cannot accept that!!!! Do people really think that disabled people are a valid target for verbal abuse and ridicule? What possible phrase or sentence which includes the word Spaca could be accepted in a positive light? The word "Spaca' is only ever used in a derogatory way. I could not accept this veiled apology, certainly not on the basis that he did not mean to offend but it is ok to use an offensive general term. Why don't we all agree that words like retard, joey, and spaca etc are not acceptable terms for every day language? Why is it so hard? Why do people judge the disabled? For pity's sake these people have not chosen to be like they are! They have had no choice! They have endured more suffering than any normal person! It makes me so angry that I know I can't change it. One thing is for sure and that is I will never accept that insulting the disabled is ever acceptable in any form. What those people who do think it normal to use those phrases and sayings don't realise is, is how much their words and actions affect the people they are targeted at. I just wish that I could convince these people I come across, to spend a day in my life. Spend a day with Lucy and see how you feel at the end of it.

In reality I know I am fighting generations of prejudice but a little awareness would go a long way. So many bigots and so many targets. Is society ever going to be a place for Lucy?


fairenuff said...

Society is ALWAYS going to have people like the insulting man you had the misfortune to meet.

But it is ALWAYS going to have people who are open hearted and care, those who want to be a part of Lucy's life and those who know how much of a difference she can make in this world.

I know Lucy is surrounded by those who love and care for her, including you. Keep doing what you are doing!

Anonymous said...

Neil, There will always be a small minority of these idiots. This person would not have the strength deal with what you and Dawn give to Lucy. Fairnuff sums this up well "Lucy is surrounded by those who love and care". eoq.
Always in our thoughts.
Lots of love
Mum & Dad . Portugal.