31Oct07 - The Special Mother

Lots of people say that you are chosen to be given a child with special needs and it has always made me cringe because why choose us. If you are chosen then what cruel lottery spat out our numbers and why. I have talked about it a lot in previous blogs so I won't labour the point. However, yesterday I read something on the "SCOPE (www.scope.org.uk)" forum which made me think differently. It opened my eyes a bit, offering a different perspective that I had not considered before. It is not necessarily about being chosen, more the qualities you need as a parent and particularly a mother. I will let you read it for yourself:

The Special Mother

Did you ever wonder how mothers of special babies were chosen?

Some how I visualize God hovering over the earth selecting his instruments of propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make such notes in a giant ledger.

"This one gets a Daughter. The Patron Saint will be Cecelia"
"This one gets Twins. The Patron Saint will be Matthew"
"This one gets a Son. The Patron Saint... Give her Gerard. He is used to profanity"

Finally he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a special child"
The Angel is curious.. "Why this one god? She’s so happy"

"Exactly," smiles god. "Could I give a special child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel!"

"But has she patience?" Asks the Angel

"I don’t want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self sorrow and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she will handle it. I watched her today, she has that feeling of self and independence that is so necessary in a mother. You see the child I’m going to give her has her own world. She has to make the child live in her world and that’s not going to be easy".

"But Lord, I don’t think she even believes in you"

God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect - She has just enough selfishness"

The angel gasps - "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child
occasionally she wont survive. Yes here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realise it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken' word. She will never consider any 'step' ordinary'. When her child does the smallest thing for the first time she will be present at a miracle and will know it. I will permit her to see clearly the things I see... Ignorance, cruelty and prejudice... and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as if she is here by my side"

"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel. His pen poised in mid air, God smiles "A mirror will suffice".